Novocaine Review: Goofy Good Times

Oh, Jack Quaid, I don’t know how to quit you…

Honestly, I saw Novocaine at an AMC preview and my initial thoughts were firmly in the “meh” category. At first glance, it is a standard Action Idiot plot. Guy meets girl, guy falls in love, something happens to girl, guy stumbles his way to her rescue.

Is it juvenile? Yup. Kinda problematic? Sure. Weirdly paced out with iffy plot choices? Oh, absolutely.

But! The more that I’ve sat with it and had time to think it over, I am ready to say I love this movie.

I am going to try and minimize spoilers here, but the plot is quickly summarized like this:

Nathan Caine (Jack Quaid) is a middle manager at a bank with a unique quirk: he was born with a genetic mutation that doesn’t allow him to feel pain, from basic cuts to broken bones. He lives a life of careful anonymity, keeping people at arm’s length due to a history of bullying. He falls in love with a teller at his bank, Sherry (Amber Midthunder). When the bank that they work at is violently robbed and Sherry is taken as a hostage, Nathan goes out on his own to save the girl who changed his life.

First of all, let’s get it out of the way: Jack Quaid was made for this. Possibly grown in a lab. His wide-eyed innocent Sweet Boy™ face is just the only way that this could be taken seriously. He plays even the most unrealistic scenario with a complete earnestness that requires unbelievable skill. You believe that he’s getting punched and that he’s getting through it. We must protect this nepo-baby at all costs.

The character of Nathan Caine is one of those unrealistic action heroes where in any other scenario, this would not play. He is a thing that can only exist in movies, where his inability to feel pain is transferred from a distinct possibility of death is always lurking into a legitimate superpower. This was done very well, in my opinion, with the character taking a bite of pie for the first time as an adult because his parents instilled a fear of solid foods early on in life so he wouldn’t bite off his own tongue. It establishes early on why this character is the way that he is, and why he is so willing to go so far to save his damsel in distress. He finally has a reason to push through his fear and be something more than a middle manager at a small bank. He is kind, and resourceful, and that never changes.

Amber Midthunder has a very interesting role as a damsel in distress. She is so good, and matches Quaid’s energy perfectly as the more savvy, sarcastic half. I am so glad that this actress is having her moment. I fell in love with her on Legion (and you should watch Legion, it’s the best Marvel movie never made.) and she is great in every part.

While I have love overall for this movie, there are some places where it falls into the usual ‘90s style action comedy pitfalls. The first is a mismatched pacing. The first big fight has Nathan shoving his hand into a working deep fryer to grab a gun, which seems to me like a thing you should lead up to since it’s a completely disabling maneuver. It’s flashy and good for trailers, I’ll give you that, but every fight after that seems underwhelming, since it shows that he’s not only unable to feel pain, but also unable to be really injured.

There are also some moments of pretty confusing editing choices, but I am willing to give it some slack in this regard given the mid-tier budget. I think the editors did the best they could with the footage that they grabbed.

The only major caveat I would have is a moment of glorifying what appears to be abuse or self-harm scars, it’s not explained which. I think this should be something that people should know going in, but it is extremely brief so as long as you go in knowing this. It is ironic, given that this is a movie where a guy fights his way through a plot unintentionally and intentionally getting hurt and injured, but it certainly shocked me in the theater.

Is it perfect? Hell, no.

But I do predict this movie going the way of a lot of fondly remembered Action Idiot movies: a cult classic to throw on for a Friday night hanging out with some buddies, smoking a bowl with a couple friends.